Our Journey to Little Miss

Unlocked

2008-09-29T21:00:00.001-05:00

For further information on Lila's Journey home and Beyond please go here. Redthreadtolila.blogspot.com

Coming Clean

2008-09-26T08:49:00.009-05:00

Well, we have a little secret that we have tried to keep quiet over the last couple of months. I think it is time to let our fellow bloggers in on it.

In August we were feeling pretty down about the whole I600 process. We, like many others were terrified that our approval would never come. We were especially concerned that our daughter's case was somewhat similar to some other families that were well beyond their 60 working days and ones that had received RFE's. We decided that if we received an RFE we would move out of the country for two years. This would have been extremely difficult for us, but it was possible. After we came to this decision we started contacting the families that were in limbo. They instructed us to contact an attorney as soon as possible. The first attorney told me that if we were planning on falling back on the law that allows you to apply for a child's Visa after they have been in your custody for two years, the adoption need to be completed prior to the MOU expiring on September 1st. (We later talked to others that did not agree that the MOU being in place was necessary). When we found out that we might not be allowed to ever bring Lila home if we did not complete her adoption by September 1st we were heart broken. September 1st was only two weeks away. We decided within a two day time period we were going to Vietnam to complete Lila's adoption prior to travel approval and prior to September 1st. Logan called our agency. They were not happy with our plan, but didn't tell us no either. The told us they would set up our G&R but that we need to fully anticipate living out of the United States for two years and we needed to keep quiet.

We left for Vietnam on August 22nd and officially adopted Lila on August 28th. Not being able to tell anyone except for close family and friends really stole a lot of our joy, and made the process even more surreal. It has been very odd when new families show up and we introduce ourselves. It has also been extremely hard not posting anything on this blog, so anyone that is still interested enough in our story to be reading, thank you. We have met so many wonderful families and babies while we have been here. Everyone has been amazing! I feel so fortunate that we were able to spend these weeks with our daughter that we would have otherwise missed. I do not regret our decision in any way shape or form. If we had not come when we did, we would have missed at least another two months of our daughters life. I'm so happy I have had the opportunity to know this amazing little girl as an eight and nine month old.

Logan left on September 14th to return to the states and go back to work. The plan was that he would transfer to France or Canada if we received an RFE and we would meet him there. It was extremely sad watching him go. I think it was even harder on Logan leaving though. I know he misses Lila (and me) like crazy. He left on day 60 of our wait. He started inquiring about our case as soon as he got home. We were also fortunate enough to have some wonderful people in our lives that were able to get our senator's office's involved in the process from the start. We got our travel approval on September 24th, and are so thankful. I am so happy that I will be returning home with our daughter so that she has the opportunity to meet her family and friends. I am so relieved that we will be with our family for the holidays. Our embassy appointment is on Monday and our flight home is on Tuesday (Logan's birthday). We miss him terribly and are so excited to see him next week. We have been given the most amazing gift in the world and I am eternally grateful to every person we have met along the way that has helped us make it through this journey and has made it possible for us to bring our daughter home.

We have been keeping a second blog for family members that know we are here. It is password protected, but I will be removing the protection on Monday (with Visa safely in hand). If you want to catch up on our adventures while in Vietnam, check it out: redthreadtolila

Thank you. I love you all.

Eeeek!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-09-24T04:41:00.001-05:00

We got it! We got our travel approval e-mail today!!!!! We are beyond thrilled and will be posting more details very soon!

Hopeful and Optimistic

2008-09-20T08:57:00.002-05:00

We have been told we should here something towards the beginning of the week. We are very encouraged and optimistic that it will be good news. We're really hoping for that travel approval on Monday. This has been one of the longest weekends of my life. The anticipation and suspense is killing me!

Still Waiting

2008-09-14T03:59:00.000-05:00

Day 60 came and went Friday. At least at this point we can start inquiring about our case. Hopefully we will be able to find something out sooner rather than later. We're still really optimistic and are hoping for good news. Wish us luck!

Day 57

2008-09-09T00:51:00.002-05:00

Today is day 57 of our wait for travel approval. It would be amazingly wonderful to hear something within the 60 day time period. We're really excited that we will at least be able to start inquiring about our case next week. We've been pretty busy lately and have not posted much lately. Hopefully the next post will be to say that we are bringing Lila home. We're staying optimistic. Keep us in your thoughts!

Irony

2008-08-09T13:54:00.005-05:00

Irony has always been a major theme in my life. So what happens when I post that we finally got a new car, the house is starting to come together, and I need to stay off the internet for a while? The universe messes with me. It messes with me in a big way...

Yep, that's the new car.

This is the tree that landed on our cars and the back portion of the house.

Our new fence.

Tuesday evening when I got home from work Logan was on the phone with HP customer support about a problem we've been having with our notebook. I called my mom, and while we were talking, I mentioned that it looked like it might storm. Literally within two minutes I looked out the back window and our fence was blowing away. I told my mom to go to her basement and I hung up. I ran onto the back porch to grab the dogs leashes, got the dogs, grabbed our passports and headed to the basement. Logan was still on the phone with HP. I heard what I thought was a loud smacking noise on one of our windows. I yelled upstairs, "What was that?" Logan calmly yelled back, "Shh, I'm on the phone...a tree fell on the house". I yelled back for him to come to the basement(not in such nice words). As he's walking down the basement steps I hear him say to the guy on the phone, "I'm sorry, I'm going to have to call you back, a tree just fell on our house and our cars." That's right, I'm a horrible person for making him get off of the phone after being on hold for 20 minutes. And all over a little thing like a large tree falling on our house. Anyway, when the tree fell it also ripped the electric box off of our house...so, no internet for me for an entire 24 hours. Does that count as doing better about checking blogs and e-mail so frequently? Seriously though, we're all fine. Stuff can be replaced. We're still smiling.

Bye Bye Day 35

2008-08-07T11:29:00.005-05:00

Fellow bloggers, I have question for you. How do you explain the USCIS’s "60 day investigation period" to people? When I try to explain why Becky and I don’t have our Daughter home yet, I always get one of a few different responses, the more common ones are as follows: "well that’s just stupid, I’d go get her anyway", “Huh,(insert long awkward pause) Why?” followed by a blank stare. My two personal favorites though would have to be, “You should call their boss and complain” or “Wow she should be walking and talking by the time you get her home” (that one hurts a little). Most of the time I avoid this question, or simply shrug off their remark and offer a generic answer like, “Oh, we hope to bring her home sooner than later.” Or, another stock answer I've got when asked by people, "Is all this trouble and work really worth it?" My answer is always; the juice is differently worth the squeeze! I know it seems like a silly answer but its an answer to a silly question. I mean think about it, would you ever ask a new Mommy after giving birth. Man was that really worth all that pain, and being pregnant for 9 months?
Like Becky, I have become an avid email stalker, mostly because the approval should come to my email box. One thing I do though, I won’t check my email for the first time until I get to work at 6 am. That way I at least have something to look forward to, and it keeps me motivated to get to work and start my day. The down side is so far, I just give myself a HUGE let down everyday. Plus I find myself dreading the weekend because they don’t count towards my “60 working days”, I know I’m sick. How many people do you know who wish their weekend would hurry so they can get to Monday?
Well here’s to day 35 as it has come and gone…Forward and onward to day 40 next week. By the way Bec has; just like the Referral and I600 receipt called Monday for approval. If she gets this one too we’re going to Vietnam via Vegas for an over night. Hope everybody has a good weekend, and hopefully next week will bring everybody’s approval. -L

The Wait

2008-08-04T19:05:00.000-05:00

I'm apparently not very good at waiting. I'm trying very hard, but it's not working. I'm grouchy and I want to bring my daughter home. People keep remarking on how impressed they are with my patience, and it cracks me up. I appreciate the compliment, but it's so not true. I'm the least patient person in the world! I'm "patient" because I have to be. What 's my other option? There isn't one, so I wait. I wait and I try to keep busy. I've managed to keep busy enough that I have not posted for a while. This is what I've been up to:

1. We bought a car!
This was bittersweet for me. I had driven the same VW since my dad bought it for me when I turned sixteen. I realized it wasn't the ideal family car due to its size, the lack of air conditioning and a few other functioning parts, and the constant beeping when it got up to operating temp, but I was really attached to it. I was reluctant to go car shopping but my mom told me that if I put our child in my old car she would report me to the Department of Children and Family Services. So...we settled on a nice safe vehicle that will allow us to comfortably transport Lila (+ future children) and our two dogs at the same time.

My Jeep! It has air conditioning and everything works! (It doesn't take a lot to impress me)

2. I had an awesome shower!
My friends and family threw me a shower on June 29th. The food and decorations were great! It was a lot of fun and I got a lot of really nice things.

Katie and me. I'm sure she's going to be the most awesome aunt ever!

3. Stocking up on the necessities
Prior to my shower we had absolutely nothing useful for the baby. She probably had 30 outfits, but no diapers, medicine, lotion, et. Logan and I decided we were going to go ahead and get everything we could possibly need for the baby. To make it interesting, we decided to do it all in one day last weekend. We had a lot of fun, but I have to admit Babies R Us can be the most nerve wracking overwhelming place on the planet. Seriously, who needs that much stuff? In Logan's prior post, he mentioned that we were like bumbling crazies, and I have to say that is a pretty dead on description. It seems so simplistic. Babies need diapers, bottles, clothes, and blankets. It's not. There were probably 30 kinds of diapers and 50 kinds of bottles, not to mention all of the things that we looked at that we couldn't even figure out what they could possibly be used for! Anyway, I think we got everything.

Trying to sort through everything to decide what we actually need.

Sock Monkey's count as a necessity.

Logan put our highchair together!

4. Shopping
This is different shopping than the shopping in the prior category, this is clothes/shoe shopping. I have been shopping...a lot. I know we have enough stuff, and that no child could possibly need anything else, but I can't stop! It's completely compulsive. I think it is because I'm really not good at sitting around doing nothing, and at least it's something baby related that I can actually do. Ebay can be so addictive! Apparently I'm more competitive than I thought, because I can't stand to see other people win! Isn't that horrible!!! Yard sales are the same way. I can find outfits that still have the tags on them for under $5. Yard sales can also be highly competitive. I've learned to get there early(not obnoxiously early, that's just embarrassing) , move fast, and really bob and weave. I'm really starting to back off of both my ebay and yard sale obsession though. I realized I had a problem when Logan called me while I was at a yard sale and I lied about where I was. Sad, I know. The first step is admitting you have a problem.

5. Weekend trip with mom
My mom and I took a weekend trip to Gurnee, Il. There is an outlet mall and lots of shopping! (I know what you're thinking, but this was BEFORE I realized I had a problem). Anyway, we had a lot of fun and bought a lot of stuff.

Yes, I did buy ten pairs of shoes.

6. Working on the house
We bought our house 8 months before we got married. We were house shopping and came across a house we loved while we were driving to a different house. Our real estate agent got us in that evening, but there was no power. We decided to look at the house by flashlight. We fell completely in love with it's charm. We decided that night that we were going to buy it. When we went back the next day we found out it was a lot less charming in the daylight. Our minds were already made up though , and we decided it couldn't be that much work to knock out a few walls and add some paint and dry wall. That was over 4 years ago. We're still working on it. We have completely gutted our house and put it back together, but it seems like there is always something left to do.

7. Projects
I recently started a journal for Lila. This is something that I have been meaning to do since we started the adoption process, but I kept putting it off. I really want to be able to describe to her the journey that made us a family, and I'm afraid I'll lose bits and pieces if I don't write them down now.

I have also started her scrapbook. It's a little sparse, but with the help of other adoptive parents that visit Lila's orphanage it's starting to come together. I'm really hoping to stay up to date on it.

I also started a quilt for Lila last weekend, but I think I'm going to scrap that idea. Too time consuming. I realize that time consuming was kind of the point, but I really just don't have the patience or the ability to sit still for the required amount of time to sew that many squares together.

8. Blog/e-mail stalking.
This has become an absolutely ridiculous habit. It must be a form of OCD. I have a routine of checking my e-mail in the morning and then systematically checking on each of the blogs on the sidebar of our blog. It wouldn't be so bad if it stopped their, but then I go through the same routine a minimum of 10 times a day. Honestly, sometimes I get out of bed in the middle of the night to check for updates. Really though, the blogs are the only thing that keep me going. It's so great to see the process moving along for other people. I love watching other families meet their child for the first time, and watching their amazing journeys in Vietnam. It makes me so happy to see how well the children that are home are doing with their families. The blogs help me connect with others that can truly understand what I'm going through and they help me keep in mind why we're waiting in the first place. I have no intention of giving up on everyones blog or my e-mail, but I need a limit. My goal is to only check in twice a day. I'll let everyone know how I do with that. Wish me luck.

So...that's pretty much my life lately. I'm working on not being so grouchy or focusing on the fact that we are waiting. I'm so fortunate to be surrounded by such an understanding and supportive group of people. Logan tells me pretty much on a daily basis that each day is a day closer to our daughter, I'm really trying to keep that in mind and enjoy every second of every day. I want to congratulate all of the families that recently received their travel approval. I am so excited for all of you!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is always great to wake up to a full e-mail box buzzing with approvals. I hope there are several more in the works along with some referrals!

New Picture

2008-07-31T17:06:00.003-05:00

We got a new picture of Lila! The baby next to her was meeting her mommy and daddy for the first time and I found this picture on their blog. Lila seems to really be studying someone closely. She looks very loved and well cared for. I really hope to be able to hold her soon!

Day 25

2008-07-24T07:08:00.003-05:00

Hmmm, I really don't have anything new to say... Things are busy around Wayne Manor, call it nesting or getting the house in shape, either way the house is our distraction right now: cleaning, painting, and organizing. Becky and I went this past weekend and finished getting all the things we think we'll need for the baby. It was very comical when we both would be very perplexed about things like; I don't know what bottle she'll like, what about diapers, or lotions, and powders, and soaps. I kind of feel sorry for Lila...having not just one but two bumbling crazies for parents. I guess that’s what makes a family though...? So today is day 25 that means next week is day 30, finally the half way point in the "60" day wait period. Come on early approval... (Fingers crossed, and a peaceful heart) -L

Oh My Gosh!!!

2008-07-14T12:56:00.011-05:00

So I just realized that I have not put any pics up of our 2 wonderful dogs, plus I feel I have failed to properly introduce you to them. Becky and I have of course 2 wonderful companions Molly (APBT) who we adopted from the local Humane Society about 2 years ago. She is by far the fun loving clown around our house (I think she takes after me, but in dog form of course). I feel she has also prepared us for children in a round about way. I'm sure that sounded funny seeing how she is a dog, but after about 6mo. of living with us we found out she was allergic to basically everything in common dog foods and treats. So she is on a salmon based dog food and gets dried sweet potatoes for treats. I know its a stretch, but after months of nursing her back to health and chasing her around the house yelling, "What do you have in your mouth? Molly, Molly get back here!" Then hearing the delightful sound of a dog getting sick. That has to be a form of toddler training. She is CGC (Canine Good Citizen) certified which is a cool title to have for her since I really want to start using her as a therapy dog. I would like to take her to visit the local hospital, and nursing homes. I am also going to try and teach her to pull a little red wagon, so when I take them on walks she'll be able to pull Lila. Talk about getting looks around town...I will so post the pics when we get her home.
Next is Meeka, the Doberman. I don't quite know what to say about her. She was the first dog Becky and I got. By Becky and I, what I'm really saying is one night while Becky was at school I went to "look" at some puppies and I got a dog. The "breeders" of our fair Meeka were less than stellar.. That's about the only polite way I can put it. Yes I know I bought a dog from a breeder, which is something Becky and I swear we'd never do, but I still think I rescued her. Meeka will be CGC as well most likely by the end of summer, or early fall depending on the adoption timeline. Meeka is our obedient to military precision dog. You say a command and BOOM its done. The only issue she has is other dogs make her very very very nervous. To pass the CGC she would have to meet a completely unknown dog. So we have been working on that very hard and I think she is getting very close to ready. So now that you know our other girls I'm happy to post some pictures of their shenanigans and hijinx.

Man molly wants to be a Parrot so bad.

Molly jumping for her ball.

Game of Tug anyone????

Meeka playing her favorite game "MINE"

A display of her awesome ability of Sit.

This it some of the fancy landscaping going on around
the house.

Ok well thats it for me so hope you all have a good week, Thursday is day 20 on our way to day 60. -Logan

Quick Update...!

2008-07-12T14:59:00.012-05:00

Friday was day 16 of our 60 day wait. We have been kind of bad bloggers for the past 2 weeks just because there really isn't much to say. Becky had a great baby shower with loads of wonderful gifts. In fact there were so many that Becky's Jeep was stuffed full including the passenger seat.

I also finished Baby Room v2.0. We of course had to go from a blue room covered in puppys, to a little more girlie room. Becky didn't pick out the paint until Friday, and the shower was on Sunday so I really had to hustle to finish it in time to put all the shower gifts in it. Thank goodness I like to paint (no really, I do like to paint, I think there might be something wrong with me). So here you go the moment I'm sure you've all been waiting for....

As I'm sure you can tell the walls are now a pastel green and the crib set is a pink and red cherry blossom kind of pattern. Oh and the boy puppy is now a girl puppy, notice the ear bows.
Other things we have been doing to kill time:

We've sent off for our visas just so they're not something we have to wait on down the road.
Fenced in part of the back yard
A little landscaping
Writing thank yous for shower gifts.
Stocking everyone else's blogs (hey there Fellow Bloggers)

Well have a good week everybody, bye for now. -Logan

Work Shower

2008-06-19T18:52:00.000-05:00

I had a surprise shower at work yesterday! I was really shocked! Three of the girls I work with are pregnant, so they threw a shower for all the mommies to be. I can't believe everyone was able to keep the shower a secret from all four of us. That's not easy in a building full of women. We had a lot of great food and presents! It was an awesome day (that morning we received our I600 receipt confirmation)!

Its the Final Count Down (almost)

2008-06-18T21:30:00.000-05:00

(Logan Posting), Well friends and Family...We have finally received word of our I-600 receipt. The 60 business day count down begins, not counting holidays or weekends 8-( . We will keep you posted. Lets all hope that the USCIS keeps on track with their 45 business day average. Fingers crossed and stomach in knots. We really, really, really need to get busy and finish up her room. I will say this news came at a great time. Becky now should have a little extra spring in her step for the shower in 2 weeks. A funny side note, Bec and I were talking Saturday about the whole 60 days issue. She was stating that "when" we get the receipt on Weds. the latest we'd be traveling would be on "stated date". Its funny how she called the receipt date and the referral date, kind of. She was one day off on the referral. I really think I need to talk her into a Vegas trip... Oh and Fathers day was good for the most part. Of course I wished Little Miss was home to help me celebrate but there is next year. I received Photo shop from Bec which was way awesome, and the father-in-law and I co-bought a Stile weed eater...

Lets play the Name game (sorry no more than 2 players).

2008-05-19T21:29:00.000-05:00

What’s in a name? Everything in our daily life has a name, mine, yours, and everybody’s. Well, I guess that’s not totally accurate. Everything except our baby girl has a name. Sigh.We really, really want to give here a name, we (meaning Becky and I) are just having a heck of a time figuring one out. The first thing we had to do was decide on one we liked, and believe me, that was easier said than done. The wife and I come from 2 separate schools of thought when it comes to baby names, Becky loves to research and read and poll and basically be scientific about it. I on the other hand come from the radical opposite end of this scale. I much prefer to have a name hit me like a bolt of lightning. Believe me, I’m not trying to convince anyone that one way is better than another. I’m just giving you a quick glance at our life as we get shot out of a cannon, and go further down the rabbit hole these last 2 weeks. So, once Becky and I figured out a short list of names, we then became educated about how we have to appease the child naming Gods (a.k.a Grandma and Great Grandma). Who for some unknown reason to me felt that they should get to weigh in on what the sweet and innocent “Little Miss” should be named. Once again the wife and I end up back at the drawing board of name trying to figure out if there is a way that we can make everybody and the third cousins’ happy. Then as if we came to some epiphany, at the exact same time ,we decided “We don’t care!, It's our baby!" Just like our parents ruined our life by giving us the names they did. We in turn feel that we have the sole right to ruin our Daughter’s life by naming her what we want. With all kidding aside, we have, at least I feel, reached an end to this madness and picked a name. But for all I know we will most likely be standing at the Giving and Receiving Ceremony, scrambling to figure out what to name the poor child. So in summation, what I think I’m trying to say, is I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to our sweet child. Because no matter how hard we try, and how much we love the totally awesome name we give you, some snot nose little kid will somehow ruin that perfect name we have given you. Then you’ll come home crying asking us why we didn’t name you something like Katie or Krista or some other name that we didn’t even think of. So , sorry in advance. 8-)

Say Cheese!

2008-05-11T21:28:00.000-05:00

Ok here you go... Here is our baby girl. She's cute, she's sweet, she's exactly half the world away. This is Logan (Dad) posting btw. Anyway, I was the one who got the call on Thursday morning. As many of you can guess, the call was met with disbelief and confusion, especially when JT said that she was a healthy baby "Girl". Wow, a daughter, this sounds very foreign to me and Becky since we've been referring to her as a him for nearly a year now. This weekend has been a whirlwind of shopping and packing up of baby boy stuff. When I say stuff, I mean everything. A years worth of yard sales, and "good buys". Its crazy, but fun. It's like we get to start over, in a good way. We were worried we'd be bored waiting for a travel date. Now we get to play catch up. Now we need to pick a new room color and bedding set (see previous post to see old baby room). So much to do and hopefully not enough time. Well anyway I guess the the only thing I can think of is, "Ready or not, here She comes". More to come later.

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice?

2008-05-08T21:26:00.000-05:00

My last post was wrong. Our son is not waiting in Vietnam for us. Our daughter is. Yep, you read that correctly, It's a girl! We are so amazed, shocked, and excited right now! We were really not expecting to get that life changing call this morning, and to top it off, the "It's a girl" really threw us off. She is absolutely beautiful. She was born on December 22nd and is at Ba Vi. We will post again shortly with more details and photos. Everyone needs to hope we travel soon!

Some Not So Positive Press

2008-04-29T21:25:00.000-05:00

I'm sure everyone has been reading a lot about the state of Vietnam adoptions in the press lately. None of it is good. I'm not going to say much about it other than some of it is true, a lot of it isn't. It is very sad to see the spin that is put on some things. I myself read an article today that stated that Vietnam would not be giving out any referrals after July 1st. This is the kind of thing that is giving me gray hair (seriously, my hair lady pointed it out)! I was a mess all day until we received an e-mail from our agency stating that this is not true at the present time. I was so relieved to discover we still might have a chance, but on the other hand, I don't want to get my hopes back up. I don't know how to describe the feeling of losing a child that you've never had to someone that has not been in the situation. In my mind I already have a child, I just haven't met him yet. I think about him every day. I smile and almost cry every time I see an Asian child (it's ridiculous, someone's going to have me arrested for staring at their child). I really feel like I have been pregnant for almost a year now and might never get a child out of the process. It kills me. I want to stay positive and optimistic and keep hoping, but gosh it hurts. We've discussed the possibility of what we will do if Vietnam shuts down, but I don't have the heart to decide on another country. I just really believe without a doubt in my mind that our son is in Vietnam. Please send positive thoughts and prayers our way that we can bring him home.

We Need Your Help!

2008-03-18T21:24:00.000-05:00

There are several families that we have met online since starting the adoption process that we have become very close to. Several of these families have received a referral but have to wait for the US government to investigate their case before they are given permission to travel to bring home their child. This is taking an unecessary amount of time and is causing great distress to adoptive parents. It is extremely hard sitting and waiting knowing that their children are growing older each day in an orphanage while their families sit here longing to bring them home. These families are missing days, weeks, and months together that they will never get back. We hope to be getting our referral sometime in the near future and cannot imagine how impossible the wait will be. Please read the excerpt below and then visit http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/AmericansforVietnamOrphans/ and sign the petition.
Signing is free, it may look like they are asking you to donate to our cause but it's actually donations for the petition site. Your signature is recorded before the donation question is even asked.

Excerpt from www.bringourchildrenhome.org:

We are a group of prospective adoptive parents in the process of adopting orphans from Vietnam. We are American citizens living across the United States, represented by multiple adoption agencies, but bound together by a single issue. While the Vietnamese government has approved our adoptions of orphans living in Vietnam, our US government is not processing the visa applications necessary for these children to enter the United States as children of American citizens.
- Adoption of Vietnamese children by Americans requires approval from the US government. Immigration (USCIS) makes sure that the child is an orphan as defined by US law. Department of State (DOS) issues the visa for the child to travel to the US.
- Last October, at least 20 visa denials (NOIDs) were issued to families who had already become the parents of Vietnamese children under Vietnamese law. The majority of these have been overturned, but many of these children still wait in foster care in Vietnam to come home.
- Last November, USCIS and DOS initiated a program they call “Orphans First,” pursuant to which Vietnamese children are classified as orphans prior to the time their adoptive parents travel to Vietnam.
- Before this program was instituted, visa approvals for Vietnamese adoptive children took 1-2 weeks. Approvals are now exceeding two months, in addition to the multiple months needed for an orphan's paperwork to be processed after referral.
- Adoption agencies report a very small percentage of visa applications having been approved under the new program (e.g., one agency has submitted over 75 I-600 applications since the first week of December, with only 7 having been completed as of 2/26/08).
- USCIS and DOS in Vietnam have not provided waiting families and adoption agencies with the status of their applications following delivery of their applications.
- Because of this “Orphans First” program, some Vietnamese orphanages are at capacity, unable to admit additional Vietnamese children in need of care, which could have serious repercussions on the health and well-being of the abandoned and relinquished children in Vietnam.
- Without these essential US government approvals, timely adoptions in Vietnam by Americans cannot proceed, and orphanages are struggling to provide heat, nourishment and adequate medical care for the orphans.
- Orphans who were to be adopted by Americans have died from pneumonia. Nine orphans recently died in northern Vietnam, and six more have been hospitalized (Vietnam News, 2/21/08).
Since the initiation of the “Orphans First” program, several hundred visa applications have piled up in Vietnam, resulting in a back-log of cases that the limited staff of our government has not been able to review and complete in the time frame they themselves proposed. Because of this, hundreds of orphans in Vietnam, all of whom have families in the United States waiting to welcome them home, are spending many extra months in an institution. Every day a child spends in an institution creates a greater risk that the child will develop reactive attachment disorder. Furthermore, many of these children either have special needs or have medical needs that are not currently severe, but require care to prevent them from becoming severe. Orphans should come first. It is time for the “Orphans First” program to start living up to its name by eliminating the red tape that is jeopardizing the health and well being of Vietnamese orphans awaiting loving homes in the United States.

4 almost 5 months DTV (If you build it he will come)

2008-03-02T21:23:00.000-06:00

1- Completed crib with Molly and Meeka
2- Quilt for crib
3- Aerial crib shot
4- Artsy pic of crib bumper and crib mate made at build-a-bear
5 -The 4 drawer dresser

So as of right now the kiddo's condo is ready when ever he is. We are still finishing up a few things like painting some wooden letter that spell out his name to hang over his crib. That way if we forget his name, it is right there to remind us ( just kidding). And we are still in search of a glider.

The walls are a light blue color, and all the furniture is an espresso color. And just in case you can't tell, the theme of the nursery is Dogs. I would also like to add that when boxes say things like "some assembly required" I feel they should really say "all assembly required" and "you might as well just throw the instructions away"

Still no news on the referral yet, but we are still optimistic. I guess that is all we can be right now. Optimistic and ready.

Three Months and Waiting.

2008-01-15T21:21:00.000-06:00

“We can only appreciate the miracle of a sunrise if we have waited in the darkness.” I heard this the other day and for one reason or another it seemed fitting. No matter how much Becky and I wish and hope, we are bound to wait, and maybe even wait some more. I’m not really sure where or what I’m attempting to say in this post. I just feel the need to check in and report the “status” of things. Most of the people that will read this post will not understand the meaning of “waiting” the same way Becky and I do. Waiting, to most people might be that annoying thing you do at the DMV, or at the check out lane in the grocery store while the person ahead of you wants to use coupons, and write a check for their 15 items they brought into the 10 items or less lane, but I digress. This feeling of waiting is indescribable. We are in love with a fairytale, one day, or many days from now we are going to be: a Mom, a Dad, a Baby, more than that we are going to be a family. Sometimes I walk into the soon to be nursery and see some of the clothes, shoes, and hats we have bought. I get waves of nervousness and anticipation when I think; one day a baby will be in this room, wearing these things. So waiting seems like such a small (but not easy) price to pay for such an awesome gift. So, I will try from now on to show patience at the DMV, or to the person in front of me at the supermarket. From what I have gathered from friends and family, my life is about to become one giant exercise in patience so I guess I better start practicing while its just the easy stuff. Well, seeing how I opened with a quote, I will end with one as well, “The keys to patience are acceptance and faith. Accept things as they are, and look realistically at the world around you. Have faith in yourself and in the direction you have chosen. ” -Ralph Marston

We are DTV!

2007-10-11T21:20:00.000-05:00

We found out yesterday that our documents were sent to Vietnam October 9th. We are officially finished with our paperwork and just waiting for our baby now! The agency said that the next time we see their phone number on our caller i.d., it will be to tell us we have a baby. We are really excited! We're going to start painting the baby's room this weekend. I found some really cute bedding (It has puppies on it of course). We hope the wait goes by quickly!

I171H

2007-09-01T21:19:00.000-05:00

WE GOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Our I 171 came in the mail today! At this point we were not expecting it to come before we left for Mexico. Surprise! I went shopping with Sarah today and Logan called to tell me it had arrived. I'm really flustered now. It is Saturday, Monday is a holiday and we have to be at the airport to leave for Mexico at 5am on Wednesday. I guess I'll be driving to Springfield Tuesday morning to have our documents state certified so we can get them in the mail. Everything is a little hectic right now, but I am so excited!

As a side note, I (Becky) type in green or white, Logan types in black when we blog.

Tick Tick Tick

2007-08-30T21:18:00.000-05:00

Logan here.
So not much going on with the adoption right now, still waiting on our I 171-H. It’s been around 6 weeks since we sent in the I600. We were really hoping to be waiting parents by the time we left for our Mexican Vacation, which is next week. Unfortunately, I don't think that it'll happen. We are how ever making plans for someone to complete our paper work if the 171 comes while we are away and get everything sent off (fingers crossed). Looking at the amount of time that has passed between the beginning of our Journey to now, we have been moving pretty fast so I guess we really shouldn't be complaining. It’s just hard not being able to see progress even though progress is being made (we think). We still could be waiting parents by mid September or sooner. Wow, there is still so much to take care of before baby comes home...every time I start making a mental list of things needing done, my thoughts instantly turn in to static, you know like when the cable goes out. Anyway, everybody is now up to date, as far as I know. More news as it comes available.

Two Steps Forward

2007-07-19T21:17:00.000-05:00

Yay! We finally seem to be making some progress! We went to our USCIS (United States Citizen and Immgration Services) fingerprinting appointment at the Federal Building in St. Louis on Monday. We were really excited to be actively doing something adoption related. We were so eager we arrived about an hour early for our 8AM appointment. After completing our final fingerprinting Logan and I were kind of depressed about the fact that no further progress could possibly be made until our CANTS clearances were completed by DCFS to complete our homestudy. We were told that CANTS clearances typically take between 2-4 weeks, Tuesday marked week 10 for us. After setting what I'm sure is a record for longest wait for CANTS clearances ever, we were thrilled today to find out that our CANTS clearences are done! Our homestudy was going to be mailed to USCIS today! USCIS will be able to begin processing our petition to bring an orphan back into the states. When they finish their process (which can take anywhere up to 4 months) we will have all of our paperwork finished and will be able to take it to Springfield to be state certified! Yippie! Everyone needs to pray that this next step doesn't set any records for longest waits. If it does, I may go crazy and drive Logan crazy in the process.

Update

2007-07-04T21:16:00.000-05:00

Well we are still waiting for our child abuse and neglect clearances. It seems DCFS is really dragging their feet on this (it’s been 8 weeks). Once DCFS finishes up then the Home Study will finally be complete, then INS can complete our I600. Hopefully that won’t take more than 3 weeks. Then we can finally get some much need forward movement. We are hopeful that we can be DTV (Dossier to Vietnam) by the end of September. Then of course it’s another grueling period of hurry up and wait, but this time we are waiting on our referral. Something positive though, I just read a blog were some Parents left for Vietnam on June 24 and will be back on US soil the 4th of July, with their baby. Eleven days, now that sounds better than three weeks. Well, that’s all I have for now the next post will be to tell you we’re DTV. Have a safe and Happy 4th.

Quick Reference of whats left.

INS finger printing
Collecting State Sealed Documents
Sent off Documents and 171H to San Fansico
Send everthing to Vietnam
Then a lot of waiting
Get Referral and Accept
Wait for travel Date
Go Get Our Baby

The Process

2007-06-07T21:14:00.000-05:00

I just want to give a general idea of the Vietnam adoption process we are going through. The first step was choosing an agency. Since our placing agency is out of state, we also had to pick a local agency to do our homestudy. A homestudy is a detailed written report of our family that is compiled and prepared by a social worker. The adoption home study requires the prospective adoptive family to gather different documents, answer several questions, and explore their reasons for adopting. We were required to write joint and individual biographies. We were fingerprinted and received background checks by the FBI, state, and local police. We gathered numerous documents, and received physicals and TB tests. We made visits to our social worker and did preadoption education courses online to make sure we are really ready for this huge commitment. On May 10th our social worker visited our house to talk to us, meet the animals, and inspect the house for possible safety issues (We passed with flying colors, no safety concerns). When all of our background checks come back, we will be finished with our homestudy. We will then be waiting for approval of our I-600A. The I-600A is the first form we will fill out with the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS). They will call us when they are ready and we will have to go get fingerprinted one more time at a designated time and location. After your I-600A is approved the USCIS will send you the I-171H which is basically permission from USCIS to bring a baby back into the country. This can take up to 4.5 months,(Please pray that ours goes much faster!) At this point we will be able to send all of our documents to their appropriate states for certification. When we get them back, we will have to send them to the the Consulate of Vietnam in San Francisco to be authenticated. Then they will finally be ready to send to our adoption agency in Oregon. Our agency will look over our documents and then send them to Vietnam to be translated and then given to their government to await approval. We will then have to wait for the referral of our child. This can take several months (Once again, pray the process is speedy for us). When we receive our referral, we will get a picture of our baby, its name, and a brief medical history. We will then have to wait for about three agonizing months to pick up our child. We plan on being in Vietnam for about 3 weeks. We will hopefully officially adopt our child the second day we are in Vietnam, the rest of the time will be spent collecting necessary documents to legally bring the baby back into the country.

2007-05-01T21:07:00.000-05:00

It's official...We're adopting!

Logan and I have always known we will adopt. We decided recently that this feels like the perfect time for us. The decision was simple, we want a baby, and there are babies that need parents. After lots of research (everyone knows my passion for researching), we have decided on an agency that we are very confident and comfortable with. We have also made the decision to adopt from Vietnam. After looking into several countries, we narrowed down our search to Kazakhstan, Russia, Guatemala, and Vietnam. Every time we decided on a different country we were drawn back to Vietnam's culture and its people. We look forward to our journey and hope all of you follow us along the way.